Glam-Racket

Lyrics

(1)

Stop eating all that chocolate
Eat salad instead  (2)
In fact, you're a half-wit from somewhere or other
Why don't you bog off back to Xanadu in Ireland (3)

Glam Rick (4)

Don't try to cheat me
I'm fragile
You hang around with camera crews in shell-suits (5)
You lecture on sweets
You read Viz comic (6)

Glam Rick

You are bequeathed in suede
You are entrenched in suede (7)
Glam Rick
You've got celluloid in your genes dad
You are Glam Rick
You've cut my income by one third
You are working on a video project
You hog the bathroom (8)
And never put your hand in your pocket
Glam Rick
You're Glam Rick

You're paging Malagna in Spain (9)
But can't read between the lines
Your price, cut down is amazing
You're one of the best songs I've ever heard by Stephen King (10)
Glam Rick
Rhinestone
Your Clearasil produces Richthofen rashes, (11)
Sideboard-like on mountains
Clearasil is in conjunction
Shadrach, the shock (12)
Glam Rick
You post out sixty-page computer printouts
On the end of forests  (13)
All the above will come back to you
And confirm you as a damn pest
Glam Rick

You're Glam Rick

 

Notes

1. Usually interpeted as a swipe at the glam revival that was apparently going on in 1993. The music is heavily indebted to glam icon Gary Glitter (see also "New Big Prinz" and "Mountain Energei").When Brix rejoined the band, she added vocals (the Peel session version is entitled "Glam Racket-Star"; the "Star" portion is Brix's contribution). Brix later claimed that "Bad News Girl" from I Am Kurious, Oranj was about her, and "Star" was meant to be a good-naturedly insulting rejoinder. The lyrics to the "Star" portion of the song:

You say that you're a star but I don't give a fuck 
I watch your head expanding as you're running out of luck
I feel empty
Cause baby you suck me
I feel empty
Cause baby you suck me clean
Go feast on someone else
Cause charity ain't my scene
I feel nothing
Cause it's nothing you make me feel
Go shine on someone else
Cause your act has lost all its appeal
So glam racket
Glam racket
Glam star racket

From Hanley's book, thanks to Dan:

From The Big Midweek: p313: "for some reason, he [MES] offers me a bar of Dairy Milk. I don't often eat chocolate, but it's such a rare thing to be offered food by the boss that I eat the lot before leaving him to get the vocals down.... <snip> ... the opening line [of Glam Racket] is him shouting at someone to stop eating all that chocolate and to eat salad instead. And that someone's a Viz-reading half-wit with a penchant for Stephen King. And that someone is also cutting Mark's income by a third and should literally bog off back to Ireland. I wouldn't care, but I was only being polite eating the blasted chocolate bar!"

And from Brix's autobiography The Rise, The Fall, and The Rise:  "the lyrics were such an obvious swipe at Mark and even allude to the old Fall song 'The Man Whose Head Expanded'. Mark was so self-obsessed, he would never think that someone in his band was writing a song about him. After years of him viciously singing about me, I finally let him have it. It was subtle revenge for 'Bad News Girl.'"

^

2. Grimo from the Fall online forum has tracked down a possible source for these lines:

I don't know if anyone has unearthed this, but the "Stop Eating Chocolate, Eat Salad Instead" line must have been inspired by "George's Marvellous Medicine" by Roald Dahl. I first realised this about a decade ago, but forgot where I found it...

"Grandma sipped some tea but never took her eyes from the little boy who stood before her. 'Never grow up,' she said. 'Always down.'

'Yes, Grandma.'

'And stop eating chocolate. Eat cabbage instead.' 

'Cabbage? Oh no, I don't like cabbage.' George said

'It's not what you like or don't like,' Grabdma snapped.' It's what's good for you that counts. From now on, you must eat cabbage three times a day. Mountains of cabbage! And if it's got caterpillars in it, so much the better!'

^


3. I'm not sure what the Ireland connection is, but the name "Xanadu" entered common usage with Samuel Taylor Coleridge's poem "Kubla Khan," which begins: "In Xanadu did Kubla Khan/ A stately pleasure dome decree." Khan's palace in Xanadu (also known as Shangdu) was the summer capital of the Yuan dynasty. The name connotes a place of pleasure and idleness, an opulent respite from gritty quotidian realities. Among the many uses of the term in popular culture, the protagonist of Citizen Kane named his estate Xanadu, and there was a 1980 film called Xanadu which featured Gene Kelly and Olivia Newton John (and was the source of multiple hit singles by both John herself and by the Electric Light Orchestra). Closer to home, in 1968 a song called "The Legend of Xanadu" by Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mich and Tich (yes, they recorded it using all those names) hit number one, and the Fall recorded the song for a 1992 compilation album called Ruby Trax

^

4. I don't know if there was a real "Rick" to whom the song is addressed. According to elvischomsky on the Fall online forum:

Despite what it says on the Lyrics Parade on this here intrawotnot, I'm pretty sure he sings "Glam wreck".

Edit: Actuafactually on listening to it again the backing vocals contrapuntally appear to be singing "Rick". Which leaves us none the wiser. Tra-la-la...

On reflection... Right been mulling this over, I think the person most of it's directed at is the mysterious co-producer of TIS and sometime Fall mixer, REX Sargeant (I think other bits may be about Dave Bush).

^

5. A shell suit is basically a shiny plastic track suit. In the 80s they were somewhat popular, although I'm not sure if they were ever associated with glam rock; Jimmy Savile, mentioned in Fortress, was known for wearing them. Shell suits were voted the worst fashion item of the past 50 years in an online poll conducted by web retailer itsme.  

^

6. Viz is a British comic magazine, featuring characters like "Johnny Fartpants," "Sid the Sexist," "Buster Gonad" and "Sweary Mary." It began life in 1979 as a punk fanzine. In 1986, MES supposedly declared that it was "not as funny as it used to be," a quote the magazine promptly placed on their cover...that's such a good note I'm leaving it in, but it is one of those persistent tales that is in fact false. Dan:

Punch magazine had "not as funny as it used to be" on its cover as early as 1989 (earliest I found); but it was said about Punch as early as 1877 and became a running joke. What Viz put on its cover - earliest i found was 1991 - was "The magazine that's not funny any more - and that's official". Clearly in doing that Viz was also making a joke about Punch. In fact, in 1988 (not 1986), MES said "It's all farts and rude words now, nothing like as inventive as when it started out." MES is also supposed to have accused Viz of selling out to Virgin.

Smith himself was featued in the magazine at least once.  

From Martin Gammon:

Further to Note 6: in one issue of Viz, "Student Grant" (an annoying student) goes to a hairdresser where various "indie" band hairstyles are offered including "the Fall-ah."
Further to the Suede saga [see note 7], Elastica did a Xmas Peel session with a "tribute'"to the Fall titled  "I want to be a King of Orient-ah."

^

7. Suede was a popular band of the early 90s, whose style was heavily indebted to glam rock. Many fans took this line to be a reference to the band, but Mark E. Smith has denied this (via Reformation) : 

"In Manchester, if you've got a job in the media, say in videos, you wear suede shoes and a suede jacket. They all do. The song has got fuck all to do with the group Suede, and they shouldn't flatter themselves to think it is."


Suede either parodied, paid homage, or both, to the Fall in a song called "Implement Yeah!" which begins: "The boy Smith's got lard for a tongue/He looks like a bum or a son or a punk/He's a basket case, he's a silent sodder/His face is odd, his voice is odder/Yeah, Implement Yeah!" 

In Quietus "Baker's Dozen" feature, Suede's Brett Anderson chose This Nation's Saving Grace as one of his 13 favorite albums, and commented on Mark E. Smith:

He was always a huge, huge influence for me, growing up and then in Suede. You can't actually hear it in Suede, but we were massive fans, Justine and I especially, we were obsessed. When Matt, Justine or I were just mucking around we wrote the song 'Implement Yeah!', which was a sort of comedy song about him. Then there was the Fall song 'Glam-Racket', which the NME or someone said was about us. Who knows what anyone's songs are about, let alone Mark E. Smith songs? I think it was a timing thing: it came out in 1993, and people just assumed it was a criticism of Suede. Mark E. Smith's too smart to write a criticism of anyone, apart from people he's been in a band with. A great artist utterly defines their own genre, and that's what Mark E. Smith's done. He's got a patent on that sound.


^


8. Although he denies the song is about Suede (see note 7), Smith did subsequently make comments involving Brett Anderson and a bathroom"First time I met Brett he keeled over and fell on the floor. I got on with him Ok but he kept following me into the toilet every time I went for a piss. It's God's honest truth. For drugs? No, no. For sex? I don't know. Maybe he just wanted to look at my underwear."

^


9. Most likely a slip for "Málaga," a city in Andalusia. This and "Xanadu" (note 3) may be intended to connote a decadent, jet setting lifestyle.

Note that the next song on The Infotainment Scan is "I'm Going to Spain" (Zack).

^

10. Stephen King is, in fact, a musician; for years he played in a band called "The Remainders," the members of which were mostly authors and included, at one time or another, Dave Barry, Amy Tan, Maya Angelou, Ridley Pearson, Scott Turow, Joel Selvin, James McBride, Mitch Albom, Roy Blount Jr., Barbara Kingsolver, Robert Fulghum, and Matt Groening.  

^

11. Clearasil is acne medication. Manfred von RIchtofen, also known as the "Red Baron," was an German flying ace during World War I, and is credited with an astonishing 80 victories. Photographs seem to suggest that his skin was pretty clear.  

^

12. Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego were the three men in the book of Daniel who survived, through divine intervention, being placed in a furnace. There was also a Marvel supervillain named Shadrach. The reference may be to something else entirely.  

From Captain Beefheart's "The Blimp": 

"Back in the fat rack/Shadrach, Meshach"

^

13. Zack notes that this "echoes this remark from an MES interview from 1991-92: 'What made me laugh was Sting's concept album. It had a book in it about how hard it was for him to write the LP, and how concerned he was about the rain forest on 20 pages of this expensive quality paper made out of loads of trees.'"

^

Comments (20)

Ted
  • 1. Ted | 11/07/2013

I have always thought it's "You lecture on Sweet" not sweets, i.e. the glam-rock group.

dannyno
  • 2. dannyno | 13/08/2014

Hanley's book "The Big Midweek" casts quite a lot of light on the lyrics to this song, many of which were directed at him (he has an Irish background).

In particular he tells a story which explains the opening lines:

"Stop eating all that chocolate
Eat salad instead"

dannyno
  • 3. dannyno | 13/08/2014

From "The Big Midweek": p313:

"for some reason, he [MES] offers me a bar of Dairy Milk. I don't often eat chocolate, but it's such a rare think to be offered food by the boss that I eat the lot before leaving him to get the vocals down.... <snip> ... the opening line [of Glam Racket] is him shouting at someone to stop eating all that chocolate and to eat salad instead. And that someone's a Viz-reading half-wit with a penchant for Stephen King. And that someone is also cutting Mark's income by a third and should literally bog off back to Ireland. I wouldn't care, but I was only being polite eating the blasted chocolate bar!"

Martin Gammon
  • 4. Martin Gammon | 19/08/2015

Further to Note 6: in one issue of Viz, 'Student Grant' (an annoying student) goes to a hairdresser where various 'indie' band hairstyles are offered including 'the Fall-ah'.
Further to the Suede saga, Justine Frischmann (one time of Suede and also Elastica) did a Xmas Peel session with a 'tribute' to the Fall titled ' I want to be a King of Orient-ah'.

dannyno
  • 5. dannyno | 10/02/2016

"In 1986, MES declared that it was "not as funny as it used to be," a quote the magazine promptly placed on their cover."

No he didn't.

And "not as funny as it used to be" is a reference to Punch magazine.

See detective work in this FOF thread:
http://z1.invisionfree.com/thefall/index.php?showtopic=39010

In fact, in 1988 (not 1986), MES said "It's all farts and rude words now, nothing like as inventive as when it started out."

MES is also supposed to have accused Viz of selling out to Virgin. I've not found a citation for that.

dannyno
  • 6. dannyno | 10/02/2016

To clarify: Punch magazine had "not as funny as it used to be" on its cover as early as 1989 (earliest I found); but it was said about Punch as early as 1877 and became a running joke. What Viz put on its cover - earliest i found was 1991 - was "The magazine that's not funny any more - and that's official". Clearly in doing that Viz was also making a joke about Punch.

dannyno
  • 7. dannyno | 10/02/2016

Martin Gammon:

"I Wanna Be a King of Orient Aah" is an Elastica session, rather than Frischmann solo, to clarify that.

bzfgt
  • 8. bzfgt | 19/03/2016

OK, sorry about that, I know it's a pet peeve of yours. Didn't the blurb actually say that, though, if MES didn't?

bzfgt
  • 9. bzfgt | 19/03/2016

Sorry, I'm reading the comments in email which is why I missed your next one, disregard.

bzfgt
  • 10. bzfgt | 19/03/2016

Martin, if you've no objection I slightly edited your remark to reflect Dan's correction (which I'm assuming is correct, you'll correct me if not).

dannyno
  • 11. dannyno | 05/05/2016

Brix's The Rise, The Fall, and The Rise confirms that she wrote the "Star" portion of the lyric. MES didn't realise it was about him:


the lyrics were such an obvious swipe at Mark and even allude to the old Fall song 'The Man Whose Head Expanded'. Mark was so self-obsessed, he would never think that someone in his band was writing a song about him. After years of him viciously singing about me, I finally let him have it. It was subtle revenge for 'Bad News Girl'.

dannyno
  • 12. dannyno | 28/08/2016

Shadrack/shadrach - there's a similar thing in the lyrics to Beefheart's "The Blimp".

Zack
  • 13. Zack | 07/11/2016

"Paging Malag(n)a in Spain" ties in thematically with the subsequent song on the album, "I'm Going to Spain."

mab
  • 14. mab | 28/12/2016

The Xanadu reference. In late 1992 The Fall's contribution to the NME compilation "Ruby Trax", commemorating the 40th anniversary of the first ever UK singles chart (which the NME published), was a version of Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mick & Tich's "Legend of Xanadu". No idea what this has to do with Ireland, but is it mere coincidence?

bzfgt
  • 15. bzfgt | 04/01/2017

Yeah it already says that in note 3!

Zack
  • 16. Zack | 04/02/2017

"Sixty-page computer printouts on the end of forests" echos this remark from an MES interview from 1991-92 (http://thefall.org/gigography/92jan-select.html):

"What made me laugh was Sting's concept album. It had a book in it about how hard it was for him to write the LP, and how concerned he was about the rain forest on 20 pages of this expensive quality paper made out of loads of trees."

bzfgt
  • 17. bzfgt | 11/02/2017

I've decided the commonly printed lyrics to "The Blimp" are wrong and Semens says "Meschach" just like it sounds and makes sense. My note, alone on the internet, reflects this. A hero? Anyone would have done it.

dannyno
  • 18. dannyno | 12/02/2017

I approve. You are a veritable hub of lyrical revisionism!

harleyr
  • 19. harleyr | 17/02/2017

>>Suede was a popular band of the early 90s, whose style was heavily indebted to glam rock. Many fans took this line to be a reference to the band, but Mark E. Smith has denied this

Worth noting perhaps that Smith dropped this line from live performances of the track after the album came out. (That's my impression anyway, not scientifically evidenced).

bzfgt
  • 20. bzfgt | 18/02/2017

Cool, harley, if anyone (Martin?) ever gets the urge to check, I'll add it upstairs, but either way it's noted here.

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